Authenticity and developing in natural progression
Acknowledgment: The following depicts concepts that are not everyone’s reality. Instead highlighting a common, shared experience of the suburban-ish middle class, which I am a product of. Let’s expand the conversation - drop a comment of how your experience differs.
What would happen if life was a natural progression, rather than something taken on by force? Consider how unnatural this progression feels. For those asking what’s so unnatural about it - life, for many of us, is predetermined.
Consider further:
Age 5 - primed for school, we enter Kindergarten
Age 11 - we graduate on to middle school
Age 14 - and then on to high school
Age 18 - after a year-long season of college applications and award ceremonies we pack our bags for college
Age 22 - here is where we exercise “choice,” some will continue on to higher education while others choose to enter the workforce
Age 22 to 30 - we’re conditioned to find our forever partner and pursue a course of life-long marriage. Oh, and if we’re not a homeowner by 30 or have a child, we begin to feel our progress has slowed and we’re not meeting expectations
Age 30+ - I’m not here quite yet, stay tuned
While these predetermined boxes get checked there’s an additional element of standardization occurring. We call this standardization “trends” and they are congruent with shaping inauthentic experiences.
We’re groomed to seek and follow the latest trends and while this primarily extends to clothes, music, and our word choice throughout adolescence, in adulthood we begin chasing trending jobs, housing situations, and side hustles. Tech? Attractive job sector. Homeowner before 30? Appealing, even if it means living beyond means. A side hustle? An Amazon storefront, influencing, and Airbnb glamor instant profit.
Truthfully, none of this is easy, especially if doing all at once. It’s hard to fit a mold, and then what happens when the trend moves on (think Tech layoffs circa 2022 - 2023)? It’s soon time to find another mold to fit, in essence, it’s time to adhere to a new identity because somewhere along the way we lose the ability to create our own.
The same external forces that determined the trends we followed and molds we fit also determine when they are no longer attractive. This creates a crux at exactly the moment needed to call us back to authenticity and toward life’s natural progression. There are inherent talents born into us, things that with enough energy thoughtfully invested can manifest into what makes us great. The pursuit in our natural inclinations is undeniable authentic growth and progression through life. It’s an ability to take back a story once drafted for you and rewrite your own words (thoughts, ambitions, beliefs) to carry you forward. In other words, an ability to create your own identity, naturally.